F*@k the Influencers

F*@k the Influencers

life design

Stop listening to how influencers tell you to live your “best life.” Instead, optimize for the things that truly make you happy.


Buckle up for a rant. I promise, there is a lesson to be learned in today’s message.

Wake up at 4am.

Workout while everyone is sleeping. The lazy bastards.

Take an ice bath while it freezing outside. No whining about how you can’t feel your fingers.

Make yourself a green smoothie with enough protein to fuel Michael Phelps for a day.

Sit down and write in your journal for 15 minutes.

Read a book a week. Good luck remembering everything you read.

Grind away at your business day and night. Rest is for the weak.


F*@k the influencers.

Stop believing everything they sell, oops, I meant tell you. Including me. Although I don’t consider myself an influencer. Oh, you don’t either? Great, then we agree.

Why am I saying this? Because I bought into it all myself.

You see, for 10-15 years I have hustled like a machine. In an attempt to be more successful I bought into all the mantras.

I woke up early. The truth is, I hated it. I’m not a morning person, I never have been. Did I get a lot done when I woke up earlier than usual? Yep. Was it impactful stuff? Sometimes. But, most of the time I just got more done early in the day and was worn out by the end of the day. I gained zero hours of productivity.

Ice baths? Um, no. Do they reduce inflammation in your body? Maybe. Do I like the feeling of a really warm shower more? Hell yes. In fact, I very much want a new shower with about three shower heads in it that can all rain down steaming water on my head.

Green smoothies? Thanks, but I can’t. I love a good berry smoothie. But, my food allergies make certain things a no for my diet. I’ll stick with a bunch of water right after waking up and then my back-to-back coffees. Because, well I love my coffee. I look forward to it every night.

I tried journaling. Religiously for years. At times it felt like a great practice. Until it became just another chore that I “had” to do every day. There can be no doubt that I learned things about myself by going back and reviewing my journal. But the themes were so consistent over the years that I learned I was just on repeat about the same old things. Now I don’t simply write about things on my mind. I actually do something about them.

I was a voracious reader for a huge chunk of my life. But, I prefer listening to podcasts these days.

Ah, yes, the grind. I’m done with that. I ground away at my own business(es) for 10-15 years. Some of them even made us a nice chunk of money. Some continue to make us a nice chunk of money. But, I’m done playing small. What I’ve learned along the way is that it takes just as much energy to sustain a $50,000 a year business as it does a $1,000,000 business. For god’s sake, I even wrote a book on this topic and still didn’t learn the lesson I was teaching in my own book.


Enough gnashing my teeth.

What’s my point today?

Stop optimizing your life based on things that work for someone else. Should you experiment with things you hear recommended by other people? Sure. Experimenting has played a large role in where I am today. The problem became that I stopped testing things and instead immediately made them part of my life.

Those things never added one ounce of happiness to my life. Because they weren’t authentic to who I am.

That’s why I killed them.

I killed off my journaling and meditation routine. Maybe it will work for you. But, they didn’t improve my mental health.

You know what does? Writing. I love writing. Even if no one will ever read a thing I publish.

A little over one year ago I wrote 46,000 words for a fiction book that was based on my family. I never published it and only let four people read it. The process of creating those 46,000 words, in less than 90 days by the way, was one of the happiest months of my life. Even though they were born from a family tragedy.

So, f*@k the influencers. Do what brings you happiness. Do what creates a spark of joy in your day. Find those things and pour yourself into them.